


A is for Amsterdam

by nastally



Series: The BDSM Alphabet [1]
Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Queen (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, BDSM, Butt Plugs, Dom/sub Play, Established Relationship, Fluff and Smut, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Masochism, Nipple Clamps, Sex Toys, Smut, Spanking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-06
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:07:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22582267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nastally/pseuds/nastally
Summary: masochism/ˈmasəkɪz(ə)m/the tendency to derive sexual gratification from one's own pain or humiliation.Or: Roger and Freddie push each other's buttons and boundaries.
Relationships: Freddie Mercury/Roger Taylor
Series: The BDSM Alphabet [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1746349
Comments: 42
Kudos: 85
Collections: Kink Week Queen & BoRhap.





	A is for Amsterdam

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, one and all! Here is my entry for kink!week and oh boy, it is kinky. Mind the tags. This is far more hardcore than anything I've previously written. Really, I mean it. 
> 
> The following prompts were used: masochism (I really indulged in this one), spanking (and this one, too), nipple clamps, aftercare. 
> 
> I really enjoyed writing this and it was also a bit of a challenge. This isn't really set in the DoA universe in my mind, it's sort of an alternative time line, if you will. In which bdsm happens. lol
> 
> To explain the title: When I was in the X-Files fandom a very, very long time ago, there was an author who wrote smutty alphabet stories. They were all bdsm themed and I lived for them, so this reminded me of that.  
> Will this turn into a series? Who knows!

_December 9th, 1974_

\- - - 

It all started with a dare. 

Well... no, Roger thought, that wasn't quite true. 

It all started with heavy snowfall south of The Hague, and the resulting executive decision to spend another night in the Netherlands on their day off between shows before the tour bus would head down to Belgium the next morning. Seeing as Amsterdam was both less than an hour's drive from The Hague and offered more hotel choices for a last minute stay, and seeing as it was _Amsterdam_ , a plan was quickly formed (and relentlessly argued in favour of by the whole band) to spend the day there. 

At just over a week into December and over a month into their second tour this year, they were cold, a bit under the weather and starting to feel the strain. Still, a day off in a city like Amsterdam seemed like a terrible thing to waste. And so they wandered around the canals in the freezing cold and let Brian drag them all into the brand new Van Gogh museum. However, after dinner, Roger and Freddie left a reluctant Brian, who hadn't really been in high spirits for a couple of days now (even Van Gogh hadn't been able to remedy that), and an exhausted Deaky, who was coming down with the cold they'd all been trying to fight off, back at the hotel as they ventured back out into the city. 

Another thing Amsterdam was famous for, after all, was its red light district. A dozen wild horses were not going to prevent Roger from walking up and down Amsterdam's sex quarter at least once just for the hell of it, especially since they hadn't had a chance to visit the Reeperbahn during their brief stay in Hamburg only days earlier. What was the point of traveling the world if you never got to see anything good? 

Ever the lover of all things risqué and outrageous, Freddie was, of course, equally excited by the idea. 

A light dusting of snow was coming down and the air was so cold Roger could barely feel his face as they walked close together and turned a corner into what felt like a world of debauchery. Pointing at red-lit windows and cracking crude jokes, they snickered like school boys and drew the disapproving looks of locals. 

And maybe that was where it all began. 

The shop was inconspicuous on first sight, easy to miss between the brothels, but on second glance it had them glued to the spot, exchanging mischievous glances and daring each other to take a look inside. After all, shops which openly proclaimed to sell "sex" were pretty hard to come by back home. 

It was certainly an experience, Roger thought, some ten minutes later, standing in front of an entire shelf of rubber dicks. Well, some of them appeared to be glass, actually. Was that safe? Some were also intimidatingly large. Not that he'd ever harboured insecurities about size. 

Until now. 

While Roger was idly wondering how many girls really wanted to shove something the size of a large courgette up their fanny, Freddie sashayed over, _caressing_ the whip he was holding. He kept up the act for all of three seconds before bursting into laughter, which prompted them both to peek over their shoulders at the rotund, middle aged lady behind the cashier's desk. They were currently the only customers in the shop, but she hadn't taken much of an interest in them other than glancing up from the book she was reading every once in a while. 

"See anything you like?" Freddie asked, barely holding it together. 

"I mean, yeah," Roger murmured back under his breath, "life's not complete without a... whatever the hell _that_ is!" 

He gave up halfway through the sentence and elbowed Freddie with a chuckle, pointing to a small collection of cone-shaped rubber toys of different colours and sizes on the bottom shelf. 

"Oh, my wee lamb," Freddie grinned like a Cheshire cat, running a hand down his arm before he bent down, glancing back over at the shop assistant before he picked up one of them. "This," he said, holding it up in front of Roger's face, "is a-" 

Freddie tried to keep a straight face, and failed, a hand flying up to his mouth. 

"A what, Freddie?" asked Roger, raising an eyebrow and biting his tongue. 

"... An anal plug," Freddie managed, making an _oh la la_ sort of face. 

"Oh," Roger nodded, eyebrows raised. "And you know this, because?" 

"Wouldn't you like to know," Freddie teased, shooting him a toothy grin. 

Roger narrowed his eyes at him because, as a matter of fact, yes, he did want to know.  
Noticing the way Roger was looking at him, Freddie simply tutted with a wave of his hand and muttered 'Kenny' under his breath. Alright, on second thought, maybe Roger didn't want to know after all. He and everyone else had heard enough about Kenny's sex life at Freddie's birthday party back in September.  
There was only one man's sex life Roger was interested in, apart from his own, because he happened to be a part of said sex life a lot of the time.  
And the fact that Freddie hadn't put the... butt plug back down yet, but was inspecting it rather curiously, was very interesting indeed. 

"... See anything... _you_ like?" Roger asked slowly, no longer on the verge of hysterical laughter. 

Freddie's eyes snapped up at him, caught out for a moment, before he attempted a nonchalant sort of shrug. 

"I mean, it's an interesting assortment of accessories, I must say..." he gestured to their surroundings, trying to look unbothered while holding a whip and a _butt plug_ and Roger broke into a grin. 

"Cause if you do..." 

"We should probably-" 

"...I think you should get it." 

"-go, before they... what?" Freddie's eyes returned to him, front teeth poking out between his parted lips. 

"I don't know, do you wanna... get something?" Roger shrugged, still grinning. "It'll be like a souvenir. Who knows if we'll be back. Right?" 

"A souvenir," Freddie repeated and pursed his lips, eyes wandering back to the shelf. "I'm just not sure I ought to be spending money on something," he said lightly, a mischievous undertone creeping in. "if I'll never _use_ it..." 

With that, he bent down and pointedly put the butt plug away, toying with the whip as he came back up. 

Roger tilted his head, watching him with an amused, lop-sided smile. Alright. He knew exactly what this was. For one, Freddie loved spending money on a whole host of useless souvenirs. Secondly, that 'I' sounded very much like a heavily implied 'we'. 

This was getting rather interesting. 

"Who says you won't?" Roger asked in a low voice and attempted to lean against the shelf in an alluring fashion. However, the shelf wobbled and he just barely managed to save one of the obscenely large dildos at the top from falling. Freddie guffawed and the shop assistant shot them a disgruntled look.

"Sorry," Roger raised a hand apologetically, and turned back to Freddie, who stood biting his bottom lip, looking both intrigued and amused. 

"Well?" he said. 

"Well, yeah," said Roger, glancing around the shop as if none of it fazed him in the least. "Take your pick."

"Oh really," Freddie raised an eyebrow and took a few steps back, eyes darting back and forth between the shelves around him and Roger. He ran his fingers along the whip and looped it around his wrist. "And what if I get one of these?"

Rising to the challenge, Roger looked around and snatched what appeared to be a rather uncomfortable gag off the shelf. "Well, then, maybe I'll get this. Might shut you up for a bit." 

He poked his tongue out between his teeth, dangling the gag in front of Freddie, who rolled his eyes and slapped it away. 

"Tell you what," he said and narrowed his eyes at Roger, "Shall we make this a little more exciting?" 

And perhaps that was where things _really_ began, Roger thought, much later. 

However, all he was thinking at the time as he stood outside the shop, smoking a cigarette while Freddie took his time acquiring something inside, was that this night had really taken an unexpected turn. They had agreed to both buy something in secret and return to the hotel for the grand reveal. It was a fun idea. Who would turn up with the most outrageous item. It was a dare. More of a joke, really. 

Right? 

It had never occurred to Roger that they might want anything besides their own selves in bed with them. It wasn't like he was _bored_. (Christ, he certainly hoped Freddie wasn't, either.) But even so, as he found himself approaching the cashier's desk not much later, intending to take home what was unmistakably a pair of nipple clamps, there was a definite buzz of excitement in the pit of his stomach. Feeling bolder by the minute, Roger stopped short of the desk and turned on his heel, marching back to the shelf they had so thoroughly inspected earlier. 

Fuck it. 

In for a penny, in for a pound. The look on Freddie's face alone would be worth it. 

\- - - 

"Oh," said Freddie, one hand propped up on his waist, as they stood looking down at the contents of their now empty bags, spread out on the bed before them.

"Hmm," Roger eyed the black leather paddle which had come tumbling out of Freddie's bag, trying to decide whether he was surprised or not, and vaguely thankful that it wasn't the whip after all. Still... 

Freddie reached across him and picked up the smallish box lying there. Opening it revealed the very same butt plug Freddie had been holding back at the shop. Roger watched him curiously out of the corner of his eye.

"You, um... you actually bought it." 

"Yup." 

"Huh." 

It was hard to tell if Freddie sounded impressed, pleased or just surprised. But it wasn't quite the hilarious kind of surprise Roger had hoped for. Their eyes met briefly before they both looked away.  
Well, this was awkward. Roger wasn't at all sure what they were doing here anymore. Hadn't they just spent the entire way back to the hotel laughing, their usual banter decidedly flirtatious, bordering on filthy? Where was all that gone, all of a sudden? 

"Well," Freddie dropped the toy back onto the bed and picked up the other thing he had bought, an innocuous-looking bottle which Roger hadn't really noticed yet. "Have you seen this?" 

"No? What is it?" 

Instead of a reply, Freddie held it up and pointed at the label, breaking into a slow grin. Roger leaned in to read it and realised that there was English lettering below the gibberish that was Dutch. _Personal lubricant_ , it said. Roger's eyebrows shot up. 

"Oh wow!" he blinked, gaping at the bottle. "As in, especially for..." 

Freddie flicked his wrist back. "Well, one can only assume."

"Damn," Roger took it from him and nodded, impressed. "that's brilliant." 

"Isn't it?" 

"Why the hell don't they sell this back home?" 

"I've no idea," Freddie sighed, "but I bought three bottles." 

Roger burst out laughing and looked back up at him. 

"Good man!" 

With the laughter, the uncomfortable tension which had arisen melted away. Roger put the bottle back on the bed and stepped closer, sliding an arm around Freddie's waist. 

"Should've got more," His hand wandered down to Freddie's arse and gave it a squeeze, "That'll barely last until the end of the year." 

"Is that right..." Freddie made a soft sound, somewhere between a chuckle and a purr low in his throat, as Roger leaned in to kiss his neck. 

"That's right," he murmured between kisses, before he sucked a patch of skin into his mouth, lifting his other hand up and threading his fingers into dark hair. Freddie shivered against him, wrapping his arms around him in return, and a moment later their lips found each other, melting into a slow, playful kiss.

"Don't wo-hngh..." Roger started when they pulled apart for a moment, but Freddie cut him off, nipping at his bottom lip. "Hey," murmured Roger when he got his lip back, giving Freddie's arse another squeeze. "Don't worry about all this stuff." He nodded toward the bed. "We don't actually have to... do anything with it." 

Freddie blinked and leaned back, giving him a long, measured look. "Whatever makes you think I was worried?" 

"I didn't mean-"

"No, no no," Freddie patted his chest in a rather patronising manner and stepped back, "let's get rid of all this worrisome, _filthy_ nonsense," He cast Roger a deliberate glance as he went to pick up everything but the paddle off the bed and moved it all to the bedside table. 

"Fred- Freddie..." Roger lay a hand on his arm just as Freddie hooked his finger through the short strap on the handle of the paddle, lifting it up. "Can you just- Can you not-" 

" _What_ , Roger?" 

"Can you just fucking tell me what you want?" Roger blurted out, not entirely sure where this sudden bout of frustration was coming from. 

Freddie seemed to mull it over for a moment. 

"No." he replied almost casually, accompanied by an infuriating little shrug. 

Roger put his hands on his hips. "No? Alright then. Just 'cause you feel like being difficult, or...?" 

Freddie tutted and rolled his eyes, swinging the paddle back and forth on his finger. 

" _No_ ," he said, with emphasis, "because it would be awfully dull, darling. That's why." 

"Jesus-" 

"I'd rather be surprised." 

"Freddie, you hate surprises."

"Says who?" 

"You! You yourself, you said it just the other day when-" 

"Oh, well, you can't possibly believe everything I say," Freddie dismissed him. 

Roger bit his tongue. Sometimes, Freddie could be utterly unbearable. He had half a mind to snatch the paddle out of his hand and-

And then, something, somewhere, suddenly clicked into place. Crossing his arms over his chest, Roger raised his chin up a little, fixing Freddie with a stern look. 

"Alright," he said slowly, "That's enough." 

Curiosity sparked in Freddie's eyes as he looked up at him again. "I'm sorry?" 

"If you carry on being so insufferable," Roger continued, as seriously as he could, "I'm gonna have to do something about it." 

Freddie looked at him for a long moment, slightly taken aback, but then promptly snorted with laughter. "Oh, will you now?" 

Roger hoped it wasn't obvious that he was biting the insides of his cheeks to keep from breaking into a grin. 

"You think I'm joking?" 

It didn't help that Freddie still looked very amused, one hand on bis hip, the paddle hanging from his finger like a fashion accessory. Roger simply raised an eyebrow, giving him the coolest, sternest look he could muster. 

Finally, the grin on Freddie's face faltered as surprise, followed by a dark sort of intrigue, replaced it. Roger could see it flow through his whole body, slowly changing his entire posture, his relaxed stance replaced by a sort of guarded sensuality. He turned aside a little, looking Roger up and down over his shoulder, a small smirk on his parted lips and his eyelids heavy. 

"What are you going to do?" he asked in a husky voice, his tone nothing short of a challenge, "Put me over your knee?" 

'Maybe,' was what Roger would have usually said, in that same teasing voice. And he'd end up smirking too, then. And it would all become a joke once more that never really lead anywhere because neither of them was quite brave enough to actually follow through with those things. The things they joked about often enough to know that both of them had to be wondering 'but what if'? 

Roger's gaze slowly wandered from Freddie, to the paddle, and back again. What if... 

His heart was thumping in his chest as he simply held out his hand, firmly holding Freddie's gaze. 

"Give it to me." 

The uncompromising steeliness in his voice surprised even himself. But the effect it had was marvelous to behold. The smirk dropped off of Freddie's face and Roger felt a pang of desire at the way the raven-haired man bit his lower lip as he handed it over. Slowly, but without protestations. 

Looking down at the black leather paddle in his hands, Roger felt both nervous and heady with excitement. In all honesty, he didn't have any idea how to do this, or even what exactly it was he had clearly just started here. 

Well, perhaps he had _some_ idea, Roger thought as he ran his hand along the black leather, wondering how much it stung on bare skin. Glancing up, he realised Freddie was watching him intently. The look on his face melted away any doubts Roger might have had about following through with what he'd started. Eyes gleaming and pitch-black, Freddie stepped closer and lay a hand on his cheek, leaning in to capture his lips in a tentative kiss which quickly grew more passionate. And even though Freddie dominated the kiss, his tongue delving deeply into Roger's mouth, it felt like permission. Almost a plea. ' _Yes._ Oh yes...'

And just like that, Roger was already half hard in his jeans. Fuck. 

He took Freddie's hand in his and moved it away from his face, gently but firmly, as he stepped back, breaking the kiss and leaving both of them wanting more. Eyes fluttering open, Freddie met his gaze again. Giving Freddie's hand a little squeeze before he released it, the tiniest, mischievous smirk ghosting over his face, Roger leaned past him and neatly lay the paddle down on the bedside table. 

"Anything here," He gestured to their small collection of novelty items, eyes still on Freddie. "that you'd like to... pack away?" 

Freddie looked back over his shoulder and contemplated the items on display for a moment, sucking on his lower lip, before he shook his head slightly. 

Not good enough. Roger needed to know. He needed to be absolutely, one hundred percent sure. 

"Is there anything here that you'd rather put away?" he repeated. "Say it, Fred." 

Freddie's eyes found his again. 

"No." he replied firmly. 

Roger felt a shiver run down his spine as his gaze briefly flitted over to the paddle, the nipple clamps and the butt plug. Oh Jesus. Well, alright then. That was settled. He still didn't feel like he had any idea what he was actually doing, but instinct and spontaneity had brought him this far so why change tactics now? 

"Alright," he took a step back and sized Freddie up for a long moment. 

"Take off your clothes," he said, his tone firm and measured. "I want you naked."

He'd half expected Freddie to come back with a witticisms, but he didn't. Well, not quite. 

"Yes, _sir_ ," the raven-haired man purred instead, his voice both amused and husky as he lifted his hands to the collar of his shirt. Much as his reply was tongue-in-cheek, the undercurrent of desire was palpable. And this time, Roger couldn't help but grin, a little.

Fuck, this was going to be one hell of a night. 

\- - - 

There was a sort of bottomless sensation in the pit of Freddie's stomach as he undid the buttons of his shirt. Breathless excitement. He was almost giddy with it, biting his lips to keep from grinning out of sheer nervous excitation. Of course, that didn't escape Roger's attention and a little crease appeared between his brows as he titled his head to the side. 

"What's so funny?" 

_God_ , that tone of voice alone gave him goosebumps. 

"Nothing," murmured Freddie, still trying to bite back a grin. 

One eyebrow raised, Roger took a step forward and leaned in just as Freddie shrugged off his shirt, lips returning to the side of his neck. Freddie shivered, and produced an involuntary little moan when Roger's hand found his crotch, palming him through his trousers. His cock grew fully hard in seconds under the other man's touch. 

"If you think you can be cheeky all night," Roger murmured against his ear and withdrew his hand when Freddie went to unbotton his trousers. "and get away with it..." The indescribable soaring sensation in the pit of Freddie's stomach intensified even before Roger had finished the sentence. "...then you're very mistaken." 

"Oh _no_... Am I in trouble?" he breathed, deliberately cheeky now, enjoying this game immensely. Sealing his fate. 

Roger pulled back and met his gaze, a look on his face like fire and cold steel, yet not without that usual sparkle of mischief in his eyes.

"Don't," he said, "talk back." 

A delightful shiver crawled up Freddie's spine and he quite literally felt his knees weaken. The interesting thing was that, when Roger had asked him what it was he wanted, Freddie didn't think that he could have given him a coherent reply even if he'd tried. Some things were very hard to say out loud. Hard to admit and even harder to put into words.

_Make me helpless._

"Off, I said," Roger prompted, nodding at Freddie's trousers, and making him realise that he had stopped halfway through unzipping them. "I shouldn't have to repeat myself."

Keeping his mouth shut this time, Freddie lowered his eyes and quickly got on with it while Roger climbed onto the bed and settled in comfortably in the middle, sat up against the headboard. Blue eyes followed Freddie's every move, drinking in his body while he shed the rest of his clothes. He could feel the piercing intensity of Roger's gaze and it raised he small hairs at the nape of his neck.

_Leave me breathless._

"Look at you," Roger's eyes lingered on Freddie's erect cock before he looked up, "so keen."

Freddie felt his face flush hot and stuck his chin out a little, one hand on his bare hip, angling for confidence in defiance of the self-consciousness he felt at being so exposed. Roger's expression softened as he stretched out a hand for him to take.

_Own my body._

"Come here," he murmured, and pulled Freddie onto the bed with him and into his lap. Straddling Roger's thighs, Freddie couldn't resist running his fingers through dark blond hair while Roger's hands stroked up the outside of his legs, coming to rest on his hips, thumbs rubbing small circles over his hip bones. "I like this," the younger man informed him, almost casually, "you... on my lap. Naked." He caught one of Freddie's hands in his and kissed the inside of his wrist, not breaking eye contact. "Absolutely fucking gorgeous."

_Worship me like I'm your dearest possession._

With a coy smile, Freddie shifted a little, his cock heavy against Roger's abdomen. There was something quite sensual about being naked while Roger was still fully clothed. It made him feel vulnerable but also exposed in a way that thrilled him, not unlike the way he felt in the spotlights in front of a crowd. Exposed, and yet empowered. He belonged to _them_ , in those moments. And right now, he belonged to Roger, who let go of his hand and touched his cheek, running his thumb along his bottom lip.

_Overwhelm my mind._

"Shall I tell you what happens next?" Roger asked, one eyebrow arched, lightly pushing his thumb between Freddie's parted lips.

"Yes," Freddie uttered, and caught Roger's thumb between his teeth, lapping at the tip of it with his tongue.

There was a dark, mischievious glint in Roger's eye, his voice a little strained as he watched Freddie suck his finger into his mouth. His grip on Freddie's hip tightened. "Yes, what?"

It took Freddie a moment to catch on, but when he did, he delivered the word with lascivious enjoyment. 

"Yes, _please_ ," A moan more than a murmur, around the other man's thumb in his mouth.

Chest rising and falling noticeably, Roger licked his lips, suppressing a smirk. "We'll have to work on your manners."

The smirk was mirrored on Freddie's face. With every minute that passed as they embarked on what was clearly a different kind of evening, he was increasingly more willing to _beg_ Roger not to stop short of the promises the night held. Not to change course or put on the brakes. Freddie nipped at Roger's thumb, a little harder.

_I want you to hurt me._

Sucking in a breath between his teeth, Roger pulled his hand away and wrapped his fingers around Freddie's cock none too gently. Freddie moaned low in his throat and instinctively tried to thrust into his hand, slack-jawed and eyes half hooded, but Roger's grip on him was tight and he kept his hand perfectly still.

"What's gonna happen," Roger rasped, as he pressed his thumb, slick with Freddie's saliva, against the tip and rubbed it back and forth over the slit. Freddie's mouth dropped open in a silent moan, eyes falling shut.

" _Fuck_ -"

"Look at me."

Freddie whined, eyes fluttering open.

"What's gonna happen," Roger repeated, tilting his head to one side, clearly enjoying himself very much, "is I'm gonna have a whole lot of fun with you tonight... and then... I'm gonna make you come so hard you'll forget your own name."

Bloody hell. Only Roger could pull off a line this cheesy, and still make it _work_ , Freddie though, sinking his teeth into his lower lip. He rocked his hips minutely into Roger's unyielding grip on him, desperate for friction, one of his hands resting on Roger's shoulder to steady himself.

"But only," Roger continued, lifting his thumb off him, "if you behave. And I have to say, you're not off to a great start."

The stern tone barely disguised the playfullness in his voice and Freddie just about managed to bite back a giggle, part nerves and part excitement.

"So, first," Lips pursed as though he was contemplating what he had clearly already premeditated, Roger released his cock, "I think we're gonna have to teach you a lesson... don't you think?"

An aching heat flooded the pit of Freddie's stomach all the way down to his balls, tight and heavy with arousal. He nodded eagerly, feeling a hot flush burn in his cheeks which spread all the way down his chest.

_I need you to hurt me harder._

"Say it."

"Yes," Freddie whispered darkly. Yes. A world of yes. 

"Good," said Roger, and patted the bed beside himself. "Off."

When Freddie had climbed off his lap to sit by his side, Roger very nonchalantly pulled himself up a bit higher against the headboard, looking as comfortable and relaxed as you like with his ankles crossed, before he turned to Freddie, raising his eyebrows.

"Lie down," he said, completely matter-of-factly, and nodded at his lap. As cool and collected as Roger seemed, as out of his mind with a heady mixture of nervous excitement and arousal Freddie felt. Heart pounding so fast he could barely breathe, he lowered himself down across Roger's lap until his hips where right over the other man's thighs, his cock pressed up against Roger's jeans and his backside up in the air. His very skin prickled with the anticipation of what was to come. A shiver ran through him when he felt Roger's warm hands on him, one on his back and one on his arse, softly tracing the curves of his buttocks. Freddie squeezed his eyes shut, somewhere between disbelief that they were really doing this and a strange, deeply thrilling mixture of arousal and something that bordered on embarassment but tingled deep inside him as pleasantly as it ached.

_Don't stop when you make me scream._

"Let's see..." Roger murmured lightly, caressing Freddie's upper thighs for a moment before he returned to his arse, kneading the firm muscle there. "We've already established your manners are sorely lacking."

As Roger's hand lifted off his backside, Freddie's breath caught in his throat, and released in a soft gasp as a resounding slap was delivered to one of his buttocks, and shortly after the other. Gentle fingers ghosted over the patches of skin they had just abused as the mild stinging sensation turned to warmth. Freddie pushed his face into the sheets, hiding the smirk on his face.

_Don't hold back, I won't break._

"And you've been a mouthy brat _all_ day..." Another two smacks landed on his arse, then a third, a little harder that time, making him jolt. Even so, Roger was being far too careful. 'Come on,' Freddie thought, wiggling his hips a little, pushing back into the gentle, soothing touches that followed between the smacks. And while the next one was definitely verging on real pain, it still wasn't enough. Before he could think better of it, Freddie gave in to an impulse which he realised he might come to regret as soon as he opened his mouth. Although mumbled into the crook of his elbow, the words were still audible enough. 

"I've seen you hit your drums harder."

Roger's hand came to an abrupt halt on his right buttock. 

"Excuse me?"

Oh shit. ( _Oh yes_.)

The drummer tapped his fingers lightly against his tingling skin and tutted. "Alright, Mercury. If that's how you wanna play it."

There was nothing careful about the series of spanks that followed, meted out in a precise, relentless rhythm. The first few made Freddie grit his teeth, but the last drew a small, pained moan from him as he writhed on top of the other man's lap, his hard cock rubbing up against Roger's jean-clad thigh. 

"Sorry, I'm sorry," he uttered breathlessly. 

"No, you're not," said Roger coolly. 

The next few spanks were accompanied by Freddie's whimpers, his fingers gripping the sheets, his whole body tense with the stinging pain that overwhelmed him each time Roger's hand collided with his arse, alternating sides. Again and again. Then Roger switched tactics and slapped him hard, twice, on each buttock, in quick succession. Freddie sobbed and kicked his feet against the bed, one hand flying up instinctively to his smarting backside, wanting and not wanting to save himself from the pain. Roger stopped, lightly resting his hand on his bare thigh for a moment while Freddie's trembling fingers brushed over burning skin before his hand limply dropped back down to the bed. 

"Oh fuck, oh god-" he whined, tears welling up in his eyes, unable to stop himself shaking and panting against the sheets. His whole body was buzzing with the intensity of it all, physical and emotional. 

"Woah," he heard Roger whisper, no longer keeping up the act but rather sounding genuinely amazed as his hand trailed up to touch his arse, administering tender caresses. "You alright?" 

"Yes," Freddie whispered back hoarsely, words tumbling from his lips of their own accord, barely making sense, "fuck, I love you... I'm yours, I'm all yours-" His voice cracked and he cut himself off, biting down on his lips. 

"Shh," Roger soothed, and bent over him to blow on his aching buttocks. The air felt cool and heavenly. "Love you, too... You're fucking amazing."

The warmth in Freddie's chest was all-consuming all of a sudden, raw love and affection washing over him like warm summer rain. When Roger's hand dipped between Freddie's legs, he eagerly spread his thighs a little wider, moaning quietly as the other man fondled his balls. His arse was stinging badly. Need and desire coiled hot and tight deep inside him, Roger's light caresses teasing and wonderful. It was almost too much to take. With a few muffled whimpers, Freddie needily rocked his cock against the other man's leg.  
Roger waited until he came down a little and was breathing more evenly again. 

"Stay right there, love," he murmured after a few moments, and Freddie whined quietly at the loss of his hand. However, the next thing he felt was Roger leaning over to the bedside table. Freddie raised his head and lifted himself up a little, peering back over his shoulder through a curtain of hair. Roger turned to him with a smile, eyelids heavy and eyes dark, holding the bottle of lubricant. 

"Gonna take it really slow tonight, yeah?" he murmured in a low voice as he poured some into his hand. "Relax..." 

Freddie hummed and lowered himself back down onto the bed with a small, catlike stretch, wiggling his arse a little. Strange as the position had felt, at first, he was now actually quite comfortable and more than happy to surrender himself to his lover's ministrations.

Slick, warm fingers found him the next moment and drew a line from his taint up to his hole, slowly massaging circles over the tight ring of muscle. Freddie exhaled and shivered, relishing the touch and the slightly too rough feeling of his cock rubbing up against Roger's trousers as he began to rock his hips back and forth again. God, Roger wasn't kidding about taking it slow. Freddie was dying to feel stretched, to feel full. 

"Come on," he half breathed, half moaned, and bit his lip when he realised he'd said it out loud. 

"Sorry, Fred," He could hear the amusement in Roger's voice, "You're not in charge tonight." Roger pulled his hand away and gave him a slap on the arse, not particularly hard, although with how sore he already was it still made Freddie jolt and hiss. "So impatient," Roger chided, returning his fingers to Freddie's hole and, this time, sliding one finger inside with little resistance. "Wow, look at that... so ready for me." Roger almost immediately added another finger, and the stretch drew a breathless whine from Freddie's throat, every movement still so tantalisingly slow. Desperate for more, he arched his back, pushing his arse up to meet the other man's fingers. "Such a little tart."

Roger gave him another slap with his free hand, making him squirm and clench around his fingers. It occurred to Freddie dimly that he had completely forgotten about the paddle lying on the bedside table. Oh fuck. The soaring sensation in his gut made a return, goosebumps cascading down along his arms and all down his body. Because somehow he didn't think Roger had forgotten all about it, or at least Freddie hoped he hadn't, and the dread/anticipation/excitement of that thought sent his heart right back into his throat. The addition of another finger, stretching him open, brought him back into the moment. 

"I could do this," Roger informed him, his voice heavy and rough with desire, "for a long time." 

Before Freddie could even contemplate a response, the other man angled his fingers inside him and dragged them over his sweet spot. Completely unable to control the desperate sounds of pleasure he was producing, Freddie squirmed on Roger's lap, shamelessly humping the side of his leg as he did it again and again. 

"But not tonight," Roger murmured, pulling his hand away and taking a moment to palm one of his buttocks. Freddie whimpered, both at the feeling of emptiness and Roger's touch. His arse still stung considerably from the spanking he'd received. The drummer tapped his backside gently. "Sit up, gorgeous." 

\- - - 

Freddie Mercury was a man of extremes. Roger knew this, and knew it well.  
Freddie liked it rough, sometimes. Enjoyed a bit of pain, generally. A bit of an edge, the illusion of helplessness. Relinquishing control.  
Roger knew that, too. 

Roger Taylor, on the other hand, was a man who liked to be in control of someone else's pleasure. Liked to have that power, and the knowledge that he was capable of driving someone absolutely wild. Sometimes. Generally. 

They had known each other intimately enough, for long enough, to know these things about one another.  
It wasn't as if they had never gone down this road before. However, thought Roger, until tonight they had never dared to go this far. 

Freddie sat up beside him and brushed a strand of hair out of his face, gazing at him expectantly. Keeping his eyes on him, Roger slowly leaned over to the bedside table and retrieved the butt plug. He held it up between them, one eyebrow raised and a smirk forming on his lips.

"D'you wanna find out what this feels like?" 

Freddie nodded. Roger couldn't tear his eyes away from him. Fuck, he looked so ruined already, tousled hair, face flushed and slack-jawed, pupils so large his eyes looked like the dark of the night. He was impossibly beautiful. Roger put the toy down in his lap for a moment and reached for the lube, pouring a bit more into his hand before he put the bottle back and proceeded to coat the butt plug in it liberally. Acutely aware that Freddie was watching him, chewing his lower lip. He considered the toy for a moment, and how best to go about this, half wishing he'd had the chance to work out a gameplan beforehand. The widest part of it was about the girth of his cock, he reckonned, maybe a little wider. Much as Roger was "in control", it was Freddie's cues he was carefully following. Going too far or too fast was not an option. Right then.  
Roger looked up and held the butt plug out to Freddie. 

"All yours."

Freddie blinked and took it after a moment's hesitation, processing the fact that Roger was inviting him to have a go while he watched, rather than have it done to him. There was something deliciously outrageous about that, Roger thought, placing a hand on Freddie's hip to guide him back onto his lap. Not unlike the times when Freddie would jerk off for him, and vice versa, something they both quite enjoyed, occasionally. He figured both of them had a bit of an exhibitionist streak.  
Freddie straddled him, one hand on Roger's shoulder to steady himself, nails brushing the side of his neck. Roger shivered. There was a sense of intimacy that overwhelmed him when, their faces so close, holding each other's gaze, Freddie reached behind himself and started to work the plug into his body. Roger hadn't thought he could get any more turned on than he had been fingering him open, and he immediately realised that he was wrong. His cock was throbbing in his jeans, his mind providing the images to what he couldn't see, but knew was happening. _Holy shit_. 

"Take your time," he rasped, his voice breathless, partly in an attempt to focus on Freddie and distract himself from how much he wanted to get his dick out and wank himself to completion right there and then. But in part also because he knew Freddie, knew he had a tendency to push his own boundaries with a vengeance, be it on stage or in private, to a degree that sometimes made Roger want to save him from himself. (God, he hoped that wouldn't be the case tonight.) "What's it feel like?" 

"Good," Freddie moaned, breaking eye contact as his eyes fell shut. Roger allowed it. He looked so beautiful like this, a small frown on his face, panting through parted, pink lips, messy curls of hair framing his angular face. Unable to bear it any longer, Roger undid his fly and groaned as he finally freed his neglected cock from the confines of his underwear. Eyes fluttering open, Freddie's gaze focused on Roger's cock and he moaned in turn, unabashed desire in his eyes. Roger bit his lip, slowly stroking himself. Much slower than he would've liked, but there was a real chance he wouldn't be able to stop himself if he went any faster.

"Can't wait to fuck you." 

Freddie moaned low in his throat, eyes falling shut again and head rolling to one side.

"Not yet, though," Roger added, not oblivious to the fact that Freddie had both arms around his neck now. His hand left Freddie's hip and cupped his arse. It was still hot to the touch, and Roger didn't quite want to admit to himself how metaphorically hot _that_ was, because it wasn't as though he actually got off on the thought of causing someone pain. But when that someone was Freddie, and he was all but begging to be hurt, to be _marked_ \- it brought out something in him Roger had never known before Freddie, and quietly doubted anyone else would have unconvered so easily. Perhaps it was as uniquely _them_ as everything else about their relationship.  
Gazing at him through thick, dark lashes, Freddie leaned in and crashed their lips together. Wet and open-mouthed, the kiss bordered on obscene. All the while, Roger's fingers slid between his buttocks to explore and ran along the flared base of the toy. 

"Feel good?" he whispered between kisses, teasingly brushing his lips against Freddie's, who readily assaulted his mouth with another ravenous kiss. While Freddie's fingers tangled in dark blonde hair, Roger's dipped under the base, touching the stretched rim.

Freddie moaned into his mouth.

Breaking away again, Roger leaned his head back against the wall with a wicked, little grin.

"Words, Freddie," he murmured and took a hold of the base, pulling it out just a little, only to push it inside again. The soft, throaty noise Freddie produced made Roger's cock twitch in his hand. 

"Feels fucking amazing," the raven-haired man moaned breathily, "Do it again."

"Hmm, you still don't know how to ask nicely," Roger let go of his dick and ran a hand up Freddie's side, pulling him closer, their cocks hot and hard against each other. "I'll remember that," he whispered and bent down, sucking a nipple into his mouth while he repeated that tiny move, tugging at the plug until he could feel Freddie's body resist and pushing it deeper inside again. Nails dug into his shoulders, hard.

" _Fuck_... oh god, oh fucking _hell_ -" Freddie whimpered as Roger relentlessly teased one nipple with teeth and tongue before he latched on to the other. Until Freddie was a trembling mess, hips thrusting against him faster and increasingly more erratic, grinding his cock against him with a needy desperation. It was far too much fun to stop, and very tempting to just let him come like this. Fuck, Roger wasn't far behind. One sensitive, puckered nipple between his teeth, Roger glanced over at the bedside table.

Mmmhno. Not yet.

He gave Freddie's nipple one last, hard suck before he grabbed his slim hips firmly and pushed him off himself, just a little. Freddie whined with disappointment, hands dropping down to his thighs and fingers curling into his palms, heavy-lidded, glassy eyes watching him. A sheen of sweat glistened on his brow, his flushed chest rising and falling rapidly and lips trembling. The way his hips were still moving in small circles, as though he just couldn't keep himself still, didn't escape Roger's attention. Wow. He wasn't sure when he had last seen Freddie quite so undone, but what a magnificient sight it was.  
Moving slowly and deliberately, Roger turned to the bedside table and leaned over, hooking one finger around the silver chain which connected the nipple clamps.

"God, Roggie," Freddie uttered in a weak, hoarse whisper, "you're gonna kill me."

Roger froze in place, turning back to him with an eyebrow raised. Freddie was staring at the nipple clamps in his hand, but when he realised Roger had stopped moving, he met his questioning gaze. A tiny smile flitted across his face, a devilish glint in his eye. 'Well, what are you waiting for?' it seemed to say. Breaking into an answering grin, Roger straightened back up with the nipple clamps in hand, pursing his lips as he inspected them briefly. Bloody hell, they were really going all out tonight. But if Freddie wanted to be ruined, who was Roger to disappoint?  
It took him a moment to work out how to best position them, his attention divided between the clamps and Freddie's face. Roger watched him carefully as the cold metal bit into his skin, and called it a success when Freddie's mouth dropped open and he exhaled harshly, arching his back, head lolling to one side.

"Shit- nghh-god... ah..." 

Roger thumbed over a trapped nipple, rolling it under his finger. Freddie very nearly sobbed, eyes barely open and fingers ghosting over his leaking cock.

"Don't you dare," Roger gave the silver chain hanging against Freddie's chest a little tug, which certainly got his lover's attention. He quickly jerked his hand back, biting down on his lip. Freddie fucking _loved_ this, when he was in the mood for it. Being made to wait. Told to hold back. Forbidden fruit was all the sweeter. Roger's hands found his wrists, holding his arms down by his sides while he leaned in close to him.

"Think you can control yourself?" he whispered against Freddie's collarbone and dipped his head lower, flicking his tongue back and forth over a nipple. 

"Ye-es," Freddie whined faintly, arching into him and straining against his hold. He didn't sound particularly convinced.

"You better." Roger sat up straight and released his wrists. "Go get me some lotion from the bathroom, will you? I reckon we might need some later," he patted Freddie's backside. In all honesty, it was just that it had occurred to him that walking around with that butt plug inside him might be _fun_ , and he wanted Freddie to give it a go. The raven-haired man squirmed a little and proceeded to climb off him unsteadily. Roger watched him make his way to the en suite and then took the opportunity to get rid of his own clothes, before he sat back down at the edge of the bed.  
However, he couldn't help but notice that Freddie took a bit longer than necessary to return. When he did, holding one of those miniature hotel product bottles, Roger leaned back on his hands, eyes following him silently. Damn, but the sight of him with those clamps and the silver chain decorating his chest wasn't something Roger had expected to enjoy as much as he did. He wet his lips, watching him set down the bottle on the bedside table before he motioned for him to climb onto his lap and gave him an apparaising look. 

"Did you touch yourself," he asked, voice playfully stern as he nodded toward the bathroom door, "in there?" 

One knee on the bed on either side of him, arms draped around Roger's neck, Freddie tried to bite back a grin. He couldn't have looked guiltier if he'd tried. 

"...No?" he cooed, faux innocently, but couldn't even keep a straight face. 

Roger shook his head, feiging disappointment - badly, while suppressing his own grin. "You're such a liar." 

Straightening up, he cupped the back of Freddie's neck and kissed him hard while his other hand wrapped around his cock. Roger swallowed Freddie's surprised, shuddering gasp and gave him a few rough strokes, delighting in the needy sounds the other man made. 

"You wanna come?" 

"Yes, please- oh fuck, _please_ -"

Releasing his cock, Roger trailed his hand up Freddie's stomach, to his chest. Christ, he was being mean tonight. Positively evil. 

"So you want me to just let it all slide?" He asked lightly, tugging at one of the clamps a little before he took a hold of it and twisted it this way and the other. Freddie writhed helplessly, digging his nails into his shoulder, dark eyes and peering at him through thick lashes. Roger leaned in and bit his neck, just below his ear, his fingers relentless in their teasing. 

"Not being able to keep your hands off your dick," he murmured, grazing Freddie's skin with his teeth, " _lying_ to me about it..." He kissed his way down across Freddie's collarbone and dipped his head lower, unable to resist the other nipple. They were just too tempting like this, squeezed tightly between hard metal, when Roger knew fully well how sensitive they were. "...forgetting your manners..." he continued over the sound of Freddie's broken moans, "Do you think you deserve to come?" 

In truth, Roger really didn't have any plans to keep it up much longer at this point. For one, he was absolutely desperate, too. He had every intention of giving in and letting Freddie 'get away with it' in a minute, but as per usual, it was Freddie who took him by surprise. 

"No," Roger heard him utter, when he had fully expected a 'yes' or pleading, at the very least. Jesus, Freddie. Really? Roger raised his head and met his eyes, sliding his hand down to Freddie's hip, stroking his thumb over the soft skin at the bend of his leg. 

"No?" he asked softly and brushed their lips together while he tried to decide how to play this. "Hmm, that's just too bad then, isn't it."

"Please," Freddie breathed against his lips.

"Please what, love?"

Roger knew, _of course_ he knew where this was going, but he needed Freddie to be the one to make the call. He wasn't sure anymore who was truly being pushed to their limits tonight. Perhaps it was both of them.

The words Freddie murmured were barely audible, but they were the unequivocal confirmation Roger had asked for and they made his spine tingle with the power they carried.

"Punish me."

There it was. 

His mouth felt dry again, all of a sudden. 

Alright. 

Alright then.

"Bed," he said, tapping Freddie's hip, almost surprised that his voice came out sounding as commanding and firm as it did. "Hands and knees." 

As Freddie climbed off his lap and did as he was told, Roger stood up and slowly rounded the bed, watching him out of the corner of his eye. Black curls hanging around his head as it dropped between his shoulders, the silver chain dangling down. A glimpse of the butt plug poking out of him. Awaiting his punishment.  
Roger's heart was pounding in his throat as he picked up the paddle. Christ, this was so far beyond anything they'd ever done. Not just the paddle, but all of it, this entire moment. It felt like something straight out of his darkest fantasies. The ones he was never even aware of until Freddie coaxed them the surface. Or perhaps it was Freddie they were reserved for. Perhaps no one else had this effect on him.  
Walking back around the bed, because Freddie had positioned himself closer to the other side, Roger decided to test the paddle on his palm. The sound made Freddie flinch, followed by an honest-to-god moan. _Jesus_. Trying not to think too deeply about how achingly hard and heavy his cock felt, Roger rubbed his stinging palm on his hip and came to a halt by the side of the bed. He couldn't see Freddie's face, his hair hanging like a curtain around it, but he could see his entire body shiver and respond as he placed the cool leather down between his shoulder blades, running it along his spine, slowly, all the way to his arse. Still pink from the spanking he'd given him earlier. 

Roger swallowed and tapped Freddie's backside lightly. 

"Tell me how many you deserve." 

\- - - 

There were very few things Freddie knew anymore. He knew that no matter which way he moved, there was no escaping the heavenly pressure inside him, nor the deliciously torturous bite of the nipple clamps. He knew he was trapped in a limbo of near-ecstasy, hovering so close to the brink for what felt like so long that his mind was nothing but a haze of pleasure. He knew that pain and pleasure were no longer two separate things, they were part of one and the same spiral of rapture, slowly undoing him. And he was hungry for more of it. Insatiable. Addicted.

But most of all, he knew that he was at Roger's mercy, and wanted him to have none. 

"Ten," he breathed in reply, hyper-aware of the paddle resting against his buttocks.

"Ten," Roger repeated, and hesitated. "Alright." 

Freddie squeezed his eyes shut. The anticipation was killing him. Waiting for the pain was worse than the actual pain.

Or so he thought, briefly.

With a resounding whack, and unsurprisingly impeccable aim, the paddle came down on one of his buttocks. Then on the other immediately after. Freddie's toes curled. _Fuck._ The difference between Roger's open palm and the unyielding leather was a notable one. Freddie whined through gritted teeth and couldn't help but clench around the plug, which in turn made him shudder with delight. His brain just about registered that he was being spoken to, over the overwhelming onslaught of sensations. 

"How many left?" 

"...Eight more," he managed, drawing an unsteady breath, fingers gripping the sheets so tightly his knuckles were white. The way the paddle ghosted over his stinging backside, barely touching, was pure torture.

Three consecutive smacks, though not as hard as the last two, landed on the same side in quick succession and by the third Freddie yelped and collapsed onto his elbows, breathing harshly. The pain was a lingering one, it didn't feel like his arse would ever stop hurting. 

"Hands and knees, Freddie," Roger reminded him, stroking the cool leather over his bruised skin. "I should add one just for that. How many?" 

"S-six," Freddie lifted himself back up on shaky arms, trying to brace himself for it, but the three whacks that followed, on the other side this time, still took his breath away and left him shaking and whimpering while the worst of the pain washed over him. Roger gently lay a hand on his abused cheek and for reasons beyond his comprehension, it was this tender touch which made Freddie's eyes burn with tears. A strangled sob rolled over his lips as something inside him released, like a trap door falling open, just as terrifying at first. Surrender. Loss of control. But also as exhilerating as freefall without the fear of crashing to the ground. No, he wasn't afraid. Because he knew it was Roger would catch him, every time. 

"Freddie..." Roger uttered his name softly right beside him, one knee on the bed, gently stroking his backside and his lower back.

"Three more," Freddie whispered hoarsely, unprompted, swallowing tears. 

He could hear Roger take a deep breath as he stood back up.

"Count them for me."

Whack! He arched his back, his body a tense bow. 

" _One_ -" 

With the next one, Freddie cried out, arms trembling, but managed to hold himself up in position. 

"Two," he choked out, "oh fuck-" 

"Just one more, love." 

With the last one, Freddie sobbed freely and allowed himself to fall back down to his elbows, hugging his head between his hands. "Three," His voice was barely audible and thick with tears, "thank you, oh fuck- _thank you_..."

Strong arms wrapped around him, warm and solid, and he readily let himself go and collapsed into them, completely boneless. Allowing himself to be rolled over, legs lifting up around the other man's waist on instinct. Roger caressed his face and kissed his tears away before their lips found each other, the kiss as deep and passionate as it was tender. Whining into Roger's mouth, Freddie rocked his hips up against him, yearning for more contact. Yearning to be so close he no longer knew where he ended and the other began.  
Roger's hand trailed down the side of his body and between his legs, pulling back just enough to look at him as he carefully tugged at the base of the plug. Freddie sighed, eyes falling shut, and Roger's lips descended to his jaw. He left a trail of kisses across his neck and made his way up to his ear while he slowly pulled the plug free. 

"Do you still want-" Roger began. Freddie cut him off before he could so much as finish the question.

"Yes, Roger, yes, _come on_ for fuck's sake." 

He hadn't quite meant for it to come out like _that_ , but the desperation was genuine. Roger snorted with laughter as he pushed himself up, reaching for the lubricant on the bedside table. As Roger sat up on his knees, Freddie pulled his legs up to his chest and dropped them sideways, not too keen for his arse to make contact with the bed just now. He stretched a little and ran a hand over his face, nipping at a nail as he watched Roger spread the lube over his cock. His other hand trailed down to his aching backside, lightly brushing over hot skin.

"My arse hurts so good," he purred salaciously, looking for a reaction. He wasn't disappointed. Roger bit his lip, casting him a dark glance. Freddie smiled a filthy little smile.

"Does that turn you on?"

Roger shook his head, not so much in the negative as in disbelief, and tried to bite back a slightly abashed grin.

"Turns _me_ on," Freddie informed him in a low murmur, quirking an eyebrow.

"You're awfully chatty," Roger grabbed one of the pillows and positioned it under Freddie's hips, scooting closer and lifting Freddie's legs up over his arms, "for someone who's about to get their brains fucked out."

"Promises..." Freddie breathed, and threw his head back with a throaty moan the next moment when Roger buried himself inside him. 

It was a promise kept. After a few slow thrusts, Roger started pounding him hard and Freddie was reduced to a writhing, inarticulate mess, moaning obscenely and clawing at the sheets. The intensity of if was unreal, heightened by everything that had gone before. When Roger's hand found his cock, pumping him fast, Freddie arched his back, very nearly screaming curses and exclamations of approval. The first tremors of his orgasm hit him like electric shocks, making his body convulse of its own volition and leaving him wrecked and breathless. Ecstasy gripped him so hard, for so long, coming out of it felt like waking from a fever dream. 

Freddie blinked his eyes open and found Roger's face above him, his legs all the way up on the other man's shoulders, both of them gasping for breath as if they'd just run a marathon. 

"Holy shit," Roger breathed, breaking into a grin, and dipped down to peck him on the lips. 

Not yet capable of words, Freddie made a noise somewhere between a sigh and a whine as the fair-haired man slowly sat up and lowered him down. 

Freddie frowned as Roger pulled out and crawled up beside him, collapsing onto the bed. "Did you...?" 

Still grinning, Roger gave him a slightly strange look. "Yeah," he snickered, "You were some place else, huh?" 

"I was," Freddie snorted, running a hand down his face. "Fuck me..." 

"Think I just did." 

"Shut up." He whacked Roger with the back of his hand and the other man caught it in his, bringing it up to his lips. 

"And these?" he asked after a moment. 

Freddie followed his gaze down to his sweaty chest and ran his fingers along the silver chain connecting the nipple clamps. 

"Oh... don't feel them after a while," he murmured, taking one off and immediately gasping as the blood returned to his nipple. Roger helpfully took off the other and Freddie squirmed with a low moan, rubbing his chest. "Ow." 

Roger just laughed, nuzzling his shoulder. "Verdict?" 

"Yes," sighed Freddie, lacking the brain power for further elaboration. 

"Yes?"

"Mmh..." Freddie was grimacing at his stomach, covered in come as he was. With an exhausted groan, Roger lifted himself up off the bed and padded to the bathroom, returning with a warm, damp towel not much later. As Freddie made no attempt to take it from him, instead opting for a lazy, catlike stretch, Roger sat down beside him and carefully cleaned him up. 

"Thank you, dearie..." Payfully running his fingers up and down Roger's biceps, Freddie watched him through his lashes, biting his lip for a moment. "I mean it," he added quietly, and hoped that Roger knew he was no longer talking about the towel. 

Blue eyes looked up at him, thoughtful and curious. "Turn over," Roger said gently, discarding the towel next to the bed. 

Freddie obediently rolled over onto his stomach and rested his head on top of his arms. Leaning over to the bedside table, Roger picked up the lotion and proceeded to empty a good part of it over Freddie's backside. It felt pleasantly cold on his skin and Freddie hummed contentedly, melting into the bed as Roger went on to spread it over his sore buttocks. 

"I... I don't know," Roger started, and broke off, collecting his thoughts. Freddie glanced over his shoulder, eyes barely open. "I don't know how far I can go," the younger man said finally, "how far you want me to go." 

Freddie lay in silence for a little while, mulling it over. 

"I can't tell you," he eventually replied, "I don't know either." 

"But-" 

"I know in the moment," Freddie added. "And anyway, you do know. I trust you." 

"Okay, but," Roger sighed. "I _don't_ know though. We should have a signal or something. Or a code word, or..." 

"Hmm, a safeword," Freddie murmured through a yawn. "It's called a safeword." 

"How do you know?" Roger sounded genuinely curious. 

Freddie, meanwhile, couldn't keep his eyes open anymore. "Kenny." 

Roger's hand paused at the top of his thigh, his tone amused and perhaps a tiny bit jealous when he spoke. 

"Do I even want to know what you've been getting up to with Kenny?"

Freddie gave a quiet giggle. "It's not like that. You know him, there's nothing he won't talk about. He's almost as outrageous as me." 

Roger chuckled, sliding his hand up Freddie's back and into his hair, nails gently grazing his scalp. "Alright, well, a safeword then. Can we have one of those?" 

"Are you literally rubbing lotion into my hair?" Freddie complained, and quickly added: "I didn't say stop," when Roger began to pull his hand away. "Mmh. Feels nice." 

"Don't change the subject." 

Freddie sighed, turning his head the other way to have the other side of his head scratched. 

"Why do we _have_ to have a word? Stop is a word. So is, fuck yes, kindly keep going." 

Roger wound Freddie's hair around his hand and pulled a little. "Fred. Can you stop being difficult for a moment? And just humour me? What if _I_ want a safe word?" 

"Fine," Freddie opened his eyes just to roll them, although he was smiling. It was sweet that Roger was so concerned. Meanwhile, Freddie didn't believe for a minute that Roger was at all capable of going _too far_. "You pick one, lovvie." 

Roger released his hair, climbed back up onto the bed beside him and slipped under the covers, lying on his side. 

"Ferrari?" he offered eventually. 

Freddie lifted himself up onto his elbows and silently stared him down. 

"What?" said Roger, defending his idea. "Aston Martin's a bit of a mouthful!" 

"Can we," Freddie groaned and put his head in his hand. "Can we _not_ \- Can it perhaps be something that doesn't kill the mood?" 

"Ferraris are sexy," Roger grumbled, frowning back at him. "It's not like I said cabbage or toe nail clippings or... Brian's mum!" 

And that concluded the discussion as Freddie burst into laughter and couldn't stop until his sides ached. 

It wasn't until some time later that night, when Freddie was on the verge of drifting off to sleep in the dark, pressed against Roger's back with one arm around him, that Roger squeezed his hand and quietly whispered:

"Hey." 

"Mmwhat?" 

"Amsterdam." 

"Whaddaboutit?“ Freddie murmured back, half-asleep. 

"Our word." Roger told him softly, pulling his arm tighter around himself. "Amsterdam." 

For a little while all was quiet, apart from their calm, deep breathing. 

"Mmh," Freddie nuzzled against Roger's back. "I like that." He sighed and pressed a kiss to his lover's shoulder, a small smile on his lips. "Amsterdam it is." 

\- - -

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading, I hope you're not too traumatised!
> 
> Please do leave me a comment, I appreciate them a lot! 💕


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